Nick (my boyfriend) and I celebrated our one year anniversary yesterday! A large part of our relationship has been cooking together, so we celebrated with a fancy steak, maple-crusted broccoli and cauliflower, stir-fried pineapple and mushrooms, white rice, and a banana-chocolate sorbet with raspberries and melted chocolate.
In celebration of this milestone, I figured we’d do another installment on the topic of “dating with allergies” as a Q&A with Nick.
Our last installment of “dating with food allergies” was more of an overall guide: this blog post aims to answer a lot of those initial questions a partner might have.
When did you find out Sam had food allergies?
I think she announced it on her profile/before we met in person.
Looking back, do you wish you’d known sooner/later?
No, that was about the right time. I wanted to kiss her on the first date and it wouldn’t have been a fun time if she went into anaphylaxis.
How has your life (and diet) changed by dating someone with food allergies?
I eat a lot more tasty home cooked stuff when we’re together – and veggies. It is a restricted palette but it forces you to put the work in and we eat some tasty stuff.
Do you still kiss each other?
Do you still eat Sam’s allergens? What are the safety protocols you have established?
I eat the poison foods when I’m not going to see her for a few days. I will do two full days of no peanuts/shellfish/peas (her severe allergens). Everything else we wait a few hours, brush my teeth, and I eat a safe meal before we kiss to make sure all remnants are gone. I haven’t actually eaten a peanut since we started dating because it’s just easier that way, and they’re not that good anyway. I might again since we’re long distance but take the 48 hour minimum protocol in that situation.
So do I need to throw out my peanut butter?
It’s usually good to not have the severe poisons floating around your home. She is allergic to wheat now and I still keep some bread around. I guess it’s alright to have a jar stashed someplace, but if you have roommates you need to make sure they’re not leaving smears of it on your counters.
Worst part about dating someone with allergies?
Best part about dating someone with allergies?
You get really good at cooking with constraints. Sam is really good at cooking now! Her food with 20 ingredients total is dramatically better than most people’s food.
Is there anything you wish you knew before we started dating?
Peas are in f***ing everything